every woman has a breaking point
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but this time, there’s a limit to my love.
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but this time, there’s a limit to my love.
i haven't blogged in awhile, but i decided why not write about what comes to mind and simply state some confessions. Its better to set some records straight that im sure has been on others temples. Speaking of blogs period the new blogs are called "tumblrs" i made one, but have yet posted anything, imaging how numerous of bloggers re-post others postings sounds unruly. i hate when im blogging and there's like so many things i want to say, but then i forget it all or i just type everything creating non-sense run-on sentences. sounds highly vague, wouldn't you agree.
confessions.
lately i had time to figure out where my feelings and emotions stood. seeing how my friends are going through unpleasant relationship problems and others trying to understand their own feelings for someone, i thought i needed to understand my own. i decided to detach all feelings and emotions for someone, just for so many reasons, i mean at the end of the day you don't want to end up looking like a fool. why hold on and incur "wishful thinking" when reality has settled. i could be wrong in so many ways, but its whats best really. i cut back on saying "i love you" i feel like its being thrown around unfairly. the feelings and emotions that are attached to that three worded phrase is simply different. i mean in order for me to completely move on i simply have to "let go" and its been hard, but i can finally admit that i have.
i have to confess that me and my ex did date a couple of times even though i said i wouldn't. i wish people could sometimes try to understand or at least be supportive even if they disagree. its obvious that no one knew and i think it will continue that way, why should our relationship be their entertainment. as of dating, we can not date and i cant emphasize that enough, yes i love her, yes she was my first love, but we just cant be. i think we are two different people with different mind sets and we tend to clash a lot, so therefore you probably will never see us together period.
i dont know if this is really a confession, but i assume since no one knew it would be considered one. i dated someone for nearly a month and laid low on our status. as you read on its quite clear already, but just had to say it for all those who didnt already know. we still remain good friends and continue to support each other which i highly adore.
i confess that i do ignore text messages! i know its horrible, but its for all types of reasons that i refuse to go into detail about. sometimes when you get a text i just read it then delete it or leave it and come back hours later to respond. most arent that important especially if your not my bestie or someone i care for. just all honesty, but i sometimes just be like why are you even texting me, because your bored and want a text buddy. i tend to sense that out of so many so therefore i just dont respond back. i also have a tendency to stop texting just because i honestly do not feel like talking to that person, i sound so evil and so wrong, but like if it was a certain someone i would break all laws to text them and others just have to wait.
anytime.
i realized who i can confide into and who will listen. i personally think i only have under five people i can talk about anything and two i can text anytime about everything. i appreciate them being there for me as well as i do the same. its always that great feeling when you can call or text feeling stressed or all over the place and they can give you a solution or even advice. even the last person i was with, i can text her and its like nothing. i apologize for the rest, but it feels like when you really need someone they aren't there and for me i refuse to hold on to something almost useless. it sounds all bad, but its really rude when you really want to talk and you can tell the person doesn't care or really not listening, they are simply excluded, the end. that's something that is highly annoying in all aspects.
speaking of the last person i was with. we get along so well! some days we text non-stop other days we don't talk at all. even though our relationship ended in a slope and for a anonymous reason, we still stay in contact. i think its rare when you see two people who aren't hostile against each other after ending their current relationship. we talk about anything and everything, our conversations are very entertaining. i just had to express that, because its hard to have conversations sometimes with people, its literally like why did you even text me. at the end of the day she still says "i love you babe" i literally went to sleep with a big a- smile.
i love you.
i just need to get my point across when i mentioned the whole ordeal about not saying "i love you" if or when you say it and you feel no jolt within then the flame is no longer burning. it goes the same as if someone said it to you. if or when its being said and you don't feel any type of emotion except reading the phrase then the lights have gone out. there are so many different analogies that people have thrown together for the reasons of this. for me i just try to understand it. thought i would get that out there since that has been lingering in my mind as well.
ridin' solo.
even though i have been on dates and so forth and so on and even made a conclusion that i am ready for a relationship, im still unsure. i think i sometimes hold the future to live up to the past, which is all backwards. but i mean what can you do, you take what you had and apply it, which may come with more expectations. but school is the only thing i can honestly be in a relationship with and stay faithful to and can give me so much AND keep me happy and sane. i love it, i wish i can just take classes forever, even though i hate all the work that comes along with it. i am so excited to start a business and be behind the scenes of watching it grow. for myself i can only remain solo, there's so many things i want to do and i cant be stopped by those who aren't reaching for the same thing.
closing this blog with a few thoughts. people ask why do you still love her or in a more suitable tone like her, and i can honestly say she is the only one that i know at the end of the day who will always have my back. she has proven that and doesn't bring unnecessary drama to the table. so many words can go so far but i am leaving it at that. i have so many more confessions that so far only some people know of, because we talk on that level, but at the moment i cant even think of any. i think ill do a blog just about my personal confessions.
confessions.
lately i had time to figure out where my feelings and emotions stood. seeing how my friends are going through unpleasant relationship problems and others trying to understand their own feelings for someone, i thought i needed to understand my own. i decided to detach all feelings and emotions for someone, just for so many reasons, i mean at the end of the day you don't want to end up looking like a fool. why hold on and incur "wishful thinking" when reality has settled. i could be wrong in so many ways, but its whats best really. i cut back on saying "i love you" i feel like its being thrown around unfairly. the feelings and emotions that are attached to that three worded phrase is simply different. i mean in order for me to completely move on i simply have to "let go" and its been hard, but i can finally admit that i have.
i have to confess that me and my ex did date a couple of times even though i said i wouldn't. i wish people could sometimes try to understand or at least be supportive even if they disagree. its obvious that no one knew and i think it will continue that way, why should our relationship be their entertainment. as of dating, we can not date and i cant emphasize that enough, yes i love her, yes she was my first love, but we just cant be. i think we are two different people with different mind sets and we tend to clash a lot, so therefore you probably will never see us together period.
i dont know if this is really a confession, but i assume since no one knew it would be considered one. i dated someone for nearly a month and laid low on our status. as you read on its quite clear already, but just had to say it for all those who didnt already know. we still remain good friends and continue to support each other which i highly adore.
i confess that i do ignore text messages! i know its horrible, but its for all types of reasons that i refuse to go into detail about. sometimes when you get a text i just read it then delete it or leave it and come back hours later to respond. most arent that important especially if your not my bestie or someone i care for. just all honesty, but i sometimes just be like why are you even texting me, because your bored and want a text buddy. i tend to sense that out of so many so therefore i just dont respond back. i also have a tendency to stop texting just because i honestly do not feel like talking to that person, i sound so evil and so wrong, but like if it was a certain someone i would break all laws to text them and others just have to wait.
anytime.
i realized who i can confide into and who will listen. i personally think i only have under five people i can talk about anything and two i can text anytime about everything. i appreciate them being there for me as well as i do the same. its always that great feeling when you can call or text feeling stressed or all over the place and they can give you a solution or even advice. even the last person i was with, i can text her and its like nothing. i apologize for the rest, but it feels like when you really need someone they aren't there and for me i refuse to hold on to something almost useless. it sounds all bad, but its really rude when you really want to talk and you can tell the person doesn't care or really not listening, they are simply excluded, the end. that's something that is highly annoying in all aspects.
speaking of the last person i was with. we get along so well! some days we text non-stop other days we don't talk at all. even though our relationship ended in a slope and for a anonymous reason, we still stay in contact. i think its rare when you see two people who aren't hostile against each other after ending their current relationship. we talk about anything and everything, our conversations are very entertaining. i just had to express that, because its hard to have conversations sometimes with people, its literally like why did you even text me. at the end of the day she still says "i love you babe" i literally went to sleep with a big a- smile.
i love you.
i just need to get my point across when i mentioned the whole ordeal about not saying "i love you" if or when you say it and you feel no jolt within then the flame is no longer burning. it goes the same as if someone said it to you. if or when its being said and you don't feel any type of emotion except reading the phrase then the lights have gone out. there are so many different analogies that people have thrown together for the reasons of this. for me i just try to understand it. thought i would get that out there since that has been lingering in my mind as well.
ridin' solo.
even though i have been on dates and so forth and so on and even made a conclusion that i am ready for a relationship, im still unsure. i think i sometimes hold the future to live up to the past, which is all backwards. but i mean what can you do, you take what you had and apply it, which may come with more expectations. but school is the only thing i can honestly be in a relationship with and stay faithful to and can give me so much AND keep me happy and sane. i love it, i wish i can just take classes forever, even though i hate all the work that comes along with it. i am so excited to start a business and be behind the scenes of watching it grow. for myself i can only remain solo, there's so many things i want to do and i cant be stopped by those who aren't reaching for the same thing.
closing this blog with a few thoughts. people ask why do you still love her or in a more suitable tone like her, and i can honestly say she is the only one that i know at the end of the day who will always have my back. she has proven that and doesn't bring unnecessary drama to the table. so many words can go so far but i am leaving it at that. i have so many more confessions that so far only some people know of, because we talk on that level, but at the moment i cant even think of any. i think ill do a blog just about my personal confessions.
